You Chose the Wrong God

It is Monday night. I have not slept for two days. I am not sure why. Worried about the new Etsy Shop, I suppose. I have been trying to cover all bases. On the other hand the family is causing some stress too. Mainly Dad. The more time goes on, the more it seems he does not like me or even love me. His words reverberate in my head, "you chose the wrong God". He said it once before a few years ago when he was explaining why he would not help me get a house like he did for my brothers...You chose the wrong God. For a long time I could not even believe myself. I know most people cannot believe a father would say that to his only daughter. I do not blame them for their disbelief. However, today, September 22, 2014 hr reiterated it again. (was that redundant? I don't...I am so tired). He also insulted my haircut. I love my Father, but it hurts so much to Love him. Does that make me selfish? I cried to him today about feeling inadequate as a mother, unable to pay for all the things the Kids want and need. He called me a whiner. As I left he said I do not give him enough credit for how much he loves me. 

It confuses me.

Now what on earth does that have to do with Jewelry?

He had a great idea. He sent me to his best friends who happen to own a Florist business. I brought about 60 percent og my Jewelry with me and together Dylan and I entered the flower shop. Me, with a big smile, Hello Hello!!! They just sot of meandered in, and took their time to get to the counter. One woman, actually never made it to the counter...She was at a counter fiddling with flowers with her back to us.

I attempted my explanation of what goes nicely with flowers but jewelry? I barely got the pieces out when the excuses started pouring like acid rain...the shop is too small. I would be afraid someone would steal them.. I felt they were being bitches. But I had just went through all that drama at my Dad's so I discounted my feelings. Then I asked about the Floral card that were on a stand on the counter. I asked if they would not mind selling me a few or if they had 3 or 4 I could have because I wanted to try something with the earrings. From the fiddling blonde at the other counter came "If you want a card, try Rite Aid:"

The entire time I was in the shop, I was pleasant, I sent regards from Dad and even told them he sent me down to them. When we left the shop, I asked Dylan if I imagined it.(that they were rude and cold) and he said "No, Mom, you did not imagine it at all". He even felt like a piece of crap in there.

Makes me wonder what kinds of stories my Daddy has told to them about me. They must have been some pretty bad and nasty ones the way they treated me. Here she is, that Monster of a daughter she is so bad to Wendall, I guess not only did I choose the wrong God bit God also chose the wrong daughter for my Father and he (Daddy) is not ashamed of to share that with his friends. 

What could have been a nice and productive afternoon, just....didn't

Now its Night

I have just 30 more minutes to finish my work. I am implementing the 5-10-5 rule.  It is something I learned from a make the most out of your Etsy

Its from a very informative blog you can find here: 

http://www.handmadeology.com/ultimate-guide-7-ways-to-increase-traffic-to-your-etsy-shop/

As I start to doze and jerk awake to 7487 letter M's I think its time to close

5 Things that made made me happy today

(DRUM ROLL)

1. My Son Dylan for patiently holding my wooden boxes of Jewelry

2. My Friend Eric, who drove to my house just to give me a hug because he explained I seemed sad the day before

3, Theresa for making laugh at her ultimate finickiness when it comes to clothes and shoes

4. My Father for reminding me just how much much I love God and that I chose the Best religion for ME

5. For the Lady in Cahoots who told me I have a knack for wire wrapping

PS THERE are so many more but my daily limit of 5 will keep the others in my head